Friday, October 24, 2008

Gestational Diabetes

Well Today I'm 30 weeks and 2 days. It's hard to believe how fast this is going by. I went to the doctor last Friday to do my glucose test and found out on Wed. that I failed. So I made an appointment to go back yesterday morning and do that dreaded 3 hour long test. I called this morning and found out I failed that one too. So looks like now I have been labeled as a gestational diabetic. They are setting up an appointment at the hospital for me with the gestational diabetes group. I'm not sure what will all happen there but I'm sure I'll find out soon enough.

I'm gonna ask my doc about an amnio to do a mature lung test before he does the c-section. And the only reason I'll ask about that is becaise he wasn't to deliver her at 38w5d. I know by then their lungs are NORMALLY developed enough, but w/ GD they sometimes have a harder time and need to be on a vent. So I want to make sure he dosen't take her too soon, ya know.

I'm just gonna accept this and move on. And do my best to watch what I eat. This will be hard though.

What about my puddin pops?!?!?!
Sodas, and cake?
Who want's veggies and sugar free jello?

O'well not too much longer I guess I'll survive.

Here's a pic I just now took it this morning.

84 comments:

Carly said...

Hey Rachel,

We are praying for you and baby Hannah. I am sorry to hear about your GD. Out of all my pregnancies I was never diagnosed with GD but I understand that you would be worried about your little sweet :) Eating no sweets would be so hard, I will pray that you don't get too many cravings for all your favourites!

You have such a perfect belly! I miss being pregnant when I see belly's like yours!

Hope you are feeling well :)

Much Love Carly x

The Gile Family said...

You look fantastic Rachel. Just like you said, this is going by quickly - stick to the good foods and you'll be back to your pudding pops in no time!

Grace said...

I have no words. I'm so, so sorry. I'm praying.

The Plis family said...

Hi,
I follow Kayleigh's story and heard about your family. I want you to know that my family will be praying for yours! Our hearts ache for you.
May the Lord bring you exactly what you need in this very difficult time.
love in Him,
Heather and family

Ali said...

Praying...

Betsy said...

Hi Rachel,

I also have been follow Kayleigh's story and heard about you and your family. You are all in our prayers during this difficult time.

caryn said...

My prayers are with you
Caryn
Another memeber of Kayleigh's prayer circle

Nichole said...

Rachel & Ryan,
I am also a follower of Kayleigh's story and Ferris Joye's Ambient Light blog. I found your story a couple of months ago and I just want to tell you that my heart goes out to you both in these most difficult moments of your lives. I lift you up to the Lord and pray that he gives the peace and strength you need to endure this season of life.
God Bless,
Nichole

"Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up. You will increase my honor and comfort me once again." -Psalm 71:20-21

momoftwinstwice said...

I am a member on Cafemom and heard the news on the december expecting group.

I am so so sorry.
I know there is nothing i can say that will help but i want you to know you and your family are in my prayers

Carly said...

Dear Rachel and Ryan,

I am so broken for you tonight. My family and friends are praying for you.

May God give you His peace and may you find Hope through this darkness. Know that you are not alone.

With our deepest sympathy and prayers across the Ocean.

Love Carly, Sam, Scarlett, River and Angel Christian.

myhelp said...

Words cannot express the sorrow I feel for your family. May God continue to cradle you in His loving arms.

Denise said...

I cam to you through carly and kayleigh's blog, please know that I am praying for you. May you find peace and may God heal you in this hard time!

Adrienne said...

Dear Rachel,
Carly from Australia and I are friends through blog world. She shared your heartache and asked for us to pray. First, I am so very sorry for your loss! I am sorry...I know no words would ever fill the sadness in your heart. I do pray that God's love and peace would surround you and that you would allow yourself to be comforted by Him...praying in CO.

Sarah J. said...

Praying for you.
(one of Kayleighs warriors)
God please let Rachel and Ryan find peace in Your spirit. guide them through this unbelievably challenging time. hold them and Hannah in Your arms. please hold them close.

mel said...

Dear Rachel and family, I found you also through Carly, and I'm so very sorry for the loss of your sweet girl. I'll be praying for you all as well. Lighting a candle too.

Warmly, Mel

Dylan's Mom said...

Came here through Carly's blog as well. Just wanted to send hugs and prayers from Ga. I'll be lighting a candle for you.

Sophie said...

Carly sent me. I'm so sorry. It is just not fair.

I will be lighting a candle tonight for both your precious girls.

Keri said...

Praying for you both.

Laura said...

I came to know your story through Kayleigh's blog. May God be with you during this time. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

T and M said...

I am so sorry for you all. I have been reading Hannah story since about june, waiting for all your good news. Kayleigh's daddy told me about your loss and I had to offer my thoughts of healing and peace to you.
I am truely thinking about you and your chldren, and sending all the comforting peaceful thoughts I can to you.
I hope you soon are able to make a full physical recovery so that you can beging to process internally.

-T

Nana to Dillon said...

Just sending up prayers. I found your story through Kayleigh's plog as well. So many people praying for you. We have traveled this road. My daughter has lost two little boys back to back. Just sending hugs/prayers. I pray you search out support and find peace in God's arms.

Amy said...

Rachel and Ryan, my heart aches for you. I have come upon your blog through Kayleigh and a couple others. Words cannot express how I feel for your loss. Keep looking to God. I know it doesn't seem fair right now, but God IS with you and LOVES YOU. Feel the warmth of HIS arms as HE wraps you with HIS love. I'm praying for a full recovery for Rachel.

In Christ's Love,

Amy S from KS

Karen said...

I also followed Kayleigh's dad's post with the link to your page and wanted to let you know how very sorry I am for the loss of your daughter, your family will be in my thoughts and prayers during this difficult time - May you find comfort in the fact that you have total strangers praying for you - and wishing nothing but health for you now as your recover from your c-section and health in your future.... God bless

Los Bianchi Carrillo said...

Dear Rachel,

I'm so sorry for your loss. We are praying for you and your family. Rest asure that God is by your side and He has something very special and important waiting for you!

Love,

Lorena, Christian & Agustina
Guatemala (Central America)

The Duncan Clan said...

Dear Ryan and Rachel,
I have been following Kayleigh's story and am just so sorry to hear about the loss of baby Hannah...there are no words. I will pray, though, that the Heaven's will shine down on you, that your beautiful angels will watch over you, and that in time you will feel happiness in your hearts once again.

My deepest sympathy,
Laura

brandi said...

Rachel, May God carry your family through this rough time in your life and bless you with healing fast and making the scar tissue dissapear so that you will be able to carry another baby with out any complications. God has a plan and please know that he will make everything ok
God bless, Brandi Ortiz in Ohio, Adam Freemans cousin

Kristin said...

You don't know who I am, but I'm also a follower of Kayleighs story, and just wanted you to know that there are so many people praying for you and your family, myself included. I am so sorry for your loss.

mommy559 said...

I'm so sorry for your your loss. I know there isn't any thing in the world that can be said to make the pain to go a way. You are in our prayers for everything that you and your family has gone through.

Tammy said...

Rachel and Ryan,

I am in your December group on Cafe mom and I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am. My heart is breaking for both of you. I hope you find the strength to get through this together. I really have no words I am so sad for both of you. Please let me know if I can do anything for either of you.

My deepest sympathy
Tammy

shannnah said...

I too am a reader of Kayleigh's and am so sorry for losses and will pray for strengh and courage for your family.

Missbehave said...

I am a member from Cafemom's December group.

I am so so sorry.
I know there is nothing i can say that will help but i want you to know you and your family are in my prayers.

Addisyn Grace said...

I am on the Dec 2008 Cafemom group with you and also follow Kaleigh's blog. I am so sorry for the loss you have experienced and you and your babies are constantly in my thoughts.

pandjmom4ever said...

I am one of your fellow moms on cafemom in our December group and heard the news. I am so sorry for your loss. I was praying for a great update about the post you left. I know there are no words I can say to make you and your husband feel better but I want you to know I will be praying for you guys.

lorna said...

Rachel and Ryan, I am so, so, so sorry for your loss. It seems like only yesterday that I cried for Carly and now for her sweet baby sister Hannah. It's not fair, you've been through so much. Find comfort that your beautiful baby girls have each other. They will forever be able to run and dance in heaven.

Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.

-Lorna

gloryrevealed said...

Hi Rachel,
I heard about what happened on Kayleigh's blog. I am so sorry. Your story breaks my heart. I know we talked a little by email several months ago as we were both in the middle of complicated pregnancies. I'll be praying for you tonight. It is so hard to understand why God allows some people to face such terrible things, but lean on him through this time.
With prayer...
Sara

orchid404 said...

I wanted to let you know that you are in my families thoughts. I'm so sorry for your loss. If there is anything I can do, please let me know. I'm on Cafemom, I go by Orchid404.

Stephanie said...

I'm visiting you from Kayleigh's blog. I don't have anything comforting to say, no words of wisdom. I just wanted to tell you that many tears are being shed over your loss of baby Hannah.

I will be praying for your quick recovery and for strength for you and Ryan.

The Woollard Family said...

Rachel & Ryan,
Y'all are in our thoughts and prayers. I can't imagine what you are going through right now. Your little girls are watching over the both of you from heaven, saving y'all a spot right next to them.

God Bless,
Heather, Joseph, & Bailey Alyse Woollard

AliciaJohnson1983 said...

I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I pray for you and hope everything goes well. I wish the best for you. I follow Kayleighs story.

Nelson Family said...

I am so sorry to hear your loss of your sweet baby Hannah. I just Pray that you can find peace and comfort during this time. I have faith that God does have a plan for you...
Lots of love
-a preemie mom

Sarah P said...

Rachel and Ryan, I am so desperately sorry for the tragic loss of your beautiful daughter. Carly directed me to your blog and I had been reading it for a while. I have no meaningful words only prayers to offer up for you.
Much love
Sarah xx

Andrea said...

I also found out about you through Kayleigh's blog. I am so sorry that you are going through this right now and I just want you to know that I'm praying for you.

I don't think there are any words that I could say to make you feel better, so I just hope that God can give you the comfort and peace that you need.

Jennifer said...

Rachel, I am praying for you and your husband. UNC has one of the best hospitals around. They'll take excellent care of you.

lisapooh98 said...

Rachel & Ryan,

I am so very sorry for your loss. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. May God give you peace and comfort during these difficult times.

Lisa C.
Hebron, KY
(Kayleigh blog follower)

campbell9023 said...

I said a prayer for you and your family this morning. You will be in my daily prayers along with Kayleigh and her family. I cannot imagine the devastation you are experiencing. May God lay his hands on you to heal and give you the strength you need in the extremely difficult time.

Jennifer

Hillary said...

Rachel and Ryan,
I came upon your story through Kayleigh's. I am praying for you both. May He hold you in the palm of His hand, catch every tear you shed, and carry you through these moments.
In prayer,
Hillary
mom to Emily, Alie and angel Natalie

JenniferNe said...

We are praying for you and your family!

laceydavidandmckenzie said...

I am so sorry to hear about your loss. May god be with you and your family in these times of needs. I am praying for you and your family. God Bless..
From Arkansas

stkcontagious said...

rachel

i love you so much. please call me if you need to talk. im so sorry rachel i just heard the news. I cant stop crying

i love you

suzy

SarahShano504 said...

Rach, it's me, Sarah...

babe, i'm SO SO SORRYYY...

i just cannot believe what i read as i was checking on Kayleigh.

i'm balling my eyes out. for you, for Ryan, your family.

I'm praying that you recover.

I broke the news to the ladies on STD, and they're in utter shock.

i love you. and i'm allllways here for you. dno't you ever forget that.

-Sarah Shano

Sarah&Adam said...

Rachel and Ryan- another Kayleigh follower :-D I am deeply grieved to hear of your loss. You are in our prayers! I wish there was something I could say that would actually help. I feel very guilty right now because I'm 34 weeks pregnant with a healthy little girl and all i can do is complain about my back ache and how hard it is to be pregnant. My troubles are so pathetic and here you are standing strong in your faith and showing the world what an awesome God we have. I may be young and not know much but I can say that I have already been amazed at how God can take something truly horrible and devastating and somehow someway use it to produce something so beautiful and incredible- I'm excited to see his blessings and his power through your situation. Stay strong! ~Sarah

Hanna's Mommy said...

Rachel and Ryan,

We are so sorry to hear about your precious Hannah. Our hearts are breaking for you. Life certainly doesn't make sense sometimes; we just pray that God will provide the strength you need to see you through these sad times. Hannah is with the Lord and he is wrapping her in His love. Hannah will have the pleasure of being reunited with her two amazing parents someday- try to find solace in knowing that you will hold her again. You are in our hearts and prayers.

With love,
The Renfrow Family

Michelle Bogart said...

Rachel, I am so sorry for your loss. I was shocked when Adam posted about your recent tragedy. Please accept my entire family's condolences. Remember the footsteps poem? Right now, God is carrying you and your family.

Let me know when you are ready for a Hannah angel baby, my hook and yarn will be waiting.

Michelle Bogart

Karen said...

Rachel & Ryan,

I came upon your story through Kayleigh's website as well. Please know that I have put your family on my prayer list. I am so sorry to read what you have been through. I'm a firm believer in that God has things happen for a reason...we may not realize what that is for many years but someday we will. Please keep faith in God and know that you have many people praying for your family.

God Bless,
Karen

Sarah said...

My family is following Kayleigh's story and our attention was brought to you and your girls stories. We just wanted to let you know that we are praying for you and your family during this time...
Benedict family from Northern NY

Smithmomof3 said...

You are in my prayers...

Rhonda said...

My heart is aching for you this morning. No words will sufficiently express to you and your husband how deeply sorry I am for your loss. I pray that your faith in our Lord and Savior will get you through this season of sorrow. Rachel, although we have never met, I have followed your story through Kayleigh's blog and I want you to know that as your sister in Christ, I will pray for you. Keep strong in knowing that your two little ones are playing at heaven's playground.
Rhonda Smith
Odenville, AL

Jolene Taylor said...

Hi, I'm another Kaylie blog Follower from Canada. I just want to say I'm so sorry for you loss, and your family is in my prayers right now! God will get you through this!
Jolene

mary said...

I'm so sorry my heart hurts for you and Rayn if I can do anything please let me know 704-301-5097 I want to come and see you'll when you feel the time is right take care love you'll (((hugs)))


Cissie

Jennifer said...

My family will pray for yours during this difficult time.
Another Kayleigh follower.

Sara said...

I am so deeply sorry for your loss. No one should have to go through that pain. I am praying for your healing and for your two angels in Heaven.
My deepest sympathy.
Sara

The luckiest Wife and Mom in the world! said...

I am so sorry for your loss. I am praying for you guys! I can not even come close to understand what you guys are going through. Just know that lots of people are thinking and praying for you!

Ferris said...

Hey Rachel,

I am so sorry to hear about Hannah. We are praying hard for you. Your courage and strength with Carly blew me away and now you are are doing it again with the most difficult situation I could ever imagine. You are such an amazing, godly woman. Know that many prayer warriors are going to the throne of God on your behalf.

Love...Ferris Joye

Cindy_Smith said...

Rachel and Ryan,
I am so so sorry for your loss. Nobody should have to go what you have been through. I pray God will see you through this and give you strength. ILY
Cindy

Mrs Redboots (Annabel Smyth) said...

So very sorry to hear that Hannah didn't make it; you must be devastated. There are no words, but I know that Heaven is weeping with you, even as Hannah is finding her place there.

momof4beautifulbeauties said...

Rachel and Ryan,

I am truly sorry for your loss and the difficult surgery you are going through. I am praying for you for healing both physically and emotionally. Please know that God is there for you to lay your burden on him and take his yoke because it is easy and light.

Praying for you,
The Scotts

Laura said...

Coming to you from New England and Carly's blog. My deepest sympathies and love go to you and Ryan.

Meg said...

I have no words , but my heart is broken for you and I am sending prayers your way. May God send you peace.

mlis238 said...

Rachel,

I am another person who follows Kayleigh's blog. I am so sorry for your loss. My heart aches for you. I am praying for you and your family.

God Bless
Melissa in Massachusetts

Laura said...

Praying....crying and praying.

karen42kids said...

Rachel,
The previous post pretty much sums it up for me. Praying, crying and praying. We will also light a candle for your angels and you tonight.
Karen

iluvmy3girls said...

I closed my eyes
and prayed to God today.
I asked what makes a Mother
and I know I heard Him say,
A Mother has a baby.
This we know is true.
But God can you be a Mother
when your baby's not with you?
"Yes you can!", He replied
with confidence in His voice,
"I give many women babies,
when they leave is not their choice.
"Some I send for a lifetime
and others for a day.
And some I send to feel your womb
but there's no need to stay.
I just don't understand this God,
I want my baby here.
He took a breath and cleared His throat
and then I saw a tear.
I wish I could show you
what your child is doing today.
If you could see your child smile
with other children and say,
"We go to earth to learn our lessons
of love and life and fear.
My Mommy loved me oh so much
I got to come straight here.
I feel so lucky to have a Mom
who had so much love for me
I learned my lesson very quick
My Mommy set me free.
I miss my Mommy oh so much
but I visit her each day.
When she goes to sleep
on her pillow's where I lay.
I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek
and whisper in her ear,
Mommy don't be sad today
I'm your baby and I'm here.
"So you see my dear sweet one,
your children are OK.
Your babies are here in my home
and this is where they'll stay.
They'll wait for you with me
until your lesson is through.
And on that day that you come home
they'll be at the gates for you.
So now you see what makes a Mother.
It's the feeling in your heart.
It's the love you had so much of
right from the very start.

auntmo said...

praying for you family, and so sorry for what you are going through...

lsj65 said...

Words can not express my sorrow for you both at this time. I am just heartbroken to imagine your sadness, and I will pray for you both to find peace, and comfort through your faith.
I will also pray for your beautiful daughters, who most surely are in heaven, being well cared for until you meet them again.
Most sincerely,
Leslie Johnson

Karen said...

There are no words. It just sucks. Period. I'm here from Kayleigh's blog as well and my thoughts and prayers are with you. Karen

Louisa said...

Dear Rachel, am praying for you and I am so sorry for your loss of Hannah, am thinking of you and sending you all my prayers and wishes during this difficult time, may Hannah rest in peace with her big sister in heaven.
With kind regards
Mum of another angel (Harry)
Louisa Line
(Melbourne, Australia)

Peyton's Mommy said...

I am so sorry that you are having to go through this again. I am praying for you that God will give you strength. Just let me know if there is anything I can do. My heart goes out to you and Ryan. I know it probably won't help but I just know in my heart that Carly, Hannah, andPeyton are playing together in heaven just waiting for us.

Sincerely,
Peyton's mom
Mindy

Keri said...

Ryan & Rachel:

No words can be said to take your pain away at this time. Just know that you are in the prayers of so many people and we wish that, with time, God will make your pain easier to bear. Praying for you and your angels...

Another Kayleigh follower,

Keri in New Hampshire

NeeNee said...

On behalf of the Fricker family and the Preemie forum we send our condolences to you in this time of need. Our hearts break for you as we praying and weep with your family. May Carly embrace her sweet sister and may they forever be laughing and running among the clouds.

NeeNee1971

mash1019 said...

My thoughts and prayers are w/ you during this very difficult time.I am so sorry for your loss, no words can comfort you after all you've been through but we are hear for you and thinking of you and praying for you!
Sha'ree
sljellis1613
preemiegroup

preemieteam said...

Oh Rachel...I am so sorry to hear about your loss...my heart is breaking for you.
Please let us know if theres anything we can do for you.
in our thoughts and prayers.
Kimberley aka countrygal from the preemie parent support group
http://z6.invisionfree.com/preemie_group/index.php?act=idx

M&M said...

I am praying for you. I thought of you today when I read Angie Smith's blog,"Bring the Rain," (http://audreycaroline.blogspot.com)she write about her infant daughter who passed away...
The Glorious Hem

Todd and I seem to be in "Spring Cleaning" mode a little early this year. In the past few days, we have started tackling some home projects that we have been putting off for awhile. One of them (which I was DREADING) was cleaning out our closets. I was dreading it for a few reasons, not the least of which was that there were some sassy pants in a size 2 that I knew God was calling me to surrender to the "in your dreams" pile. I decided I need to take some pressure off myself about losing all of my baby weight, so I was actually pretty liberal with my sorting this time around. I was also dreading cleaning out the girl's closets because there were stacks of clothes that needed to be sorted by size and season, and different piles for people who have little girls (Summer, Amelia, and Bella..comin' at 'ya!!!!). I have been putting it off forever, so I committed the afternoon yesterday and set up shop in Kate's room. I turned on the radio and started reaching for the piles.



About a half hour later, I was in tears.


I hadn't expected it to be so mentally draining. I have mentioned this before, but I really feel like I see life in photographs. I remember the outfit Ellie was wearing when she realized that the hose water was freezing, and about 2 seconds later when she taught Abby the same lesson the hard way. I remember what Kate wore home from the hospital, and what blankie I first photographed her in. I remember the bathing suit that Abby was wearing when she felt beach sand for the first time.


I remember the dresses the girls were wearing last Christmas, when I was a few months pregnant with a baby girl I thought was healthy. I have one of our Christmas cards from last year and it is signed "Todd, Angie, Ellie, Abby, Kate and Baby Smith."


I grieved all over again, in a different way. I grieved because I can't hold her in those sweet hand-me-downs while rocking her to sleep. It seems like at this point, the hardest moments come in ways that are totally unexpected. I start to feel like I am doing really well, and then I get hit over the head with this queasy feeling of agony.


I sat on Kate's floor and dreamed of Audrey for awhile. I miss her so much, and I daily mourn the loss of the little moments of life I take for granted with the girls.


As I made my way into my closet, I felt so heavy with sadness. I started throwing my maternity clothes into a giant bag while I had a little "conversation" with God. It was pretty one-sided.


At least it was at first.


After a few minutes, I looked up and saw the bag that has my wedding dress in it. When I talk about "the Lord speaking to me," it is in a time like this, when I feel a prompting to do something and I know that it is coming from Him. In this moment, I felt like I needed to unzip the bag. It seemed a little odd, but I know Him well enough to know that I should just obey the urging and let Him guide me to where I am supposed to be. I unzipped the bag and for a brief moment, my mind was consumed with the fact that I used to have a 21 inch waist, but then I remembered that the God of the Universe was speaking to me (clap, clap!) so I returned to a posture of listening.


I pulled the bottom of the dress out of the bag and the train came spilling out. I spread it out on the ground and studied it as moments of my wedding day came to mind. I started to relax and my eyes drifted to the edges of the train. And I saw the most incredible, unexpected thing.


The hem of my gown is dirty. Really dirty.


And I know how it got that way. I walked down a church aisle, took photographs in the grass, and danced and ate my way to happiness. I lived in it.


A few dresses down from my wedding gown is the dress I wore when we buried Audrey. It is dirty as well, but not from happiness. It is stained with fresh earth, wrinkled from kneeling by my daughter's grave.


And so I sat on my closet floor asking the Lord to show me why He had brought me here. I closed my eyes and imagined the hem of my wedding gown as I danced with my new husband.


"... I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. He who was seated on the throne said, "I am making everything new!" Then he said, "Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true."
Revelation 21:2-5


I couldn't remember the whole scripture, but the words "You are the bride of Christ" came to mind. I suddenly had an image in my mind of myself in a glorious white gown that floated all around me. A seemingly endless train chasing after me as I walked.


And then, Him.


I couldn't see Him in my mind, but I felt a great peace as I imagined my hands, clutching at fabric all around me so I could run to where He was. I saw myself, falling before Him as my dirty gown settled all around me. Dirty from the hurt and the disappointment. Dirty from the dancing in joy. Dirty from years of walking across a wet graveyard. Dirty from loving deeply, richly, completely. Dirty from the fears, the dreams, the sorrow, the confusion. Dirty from the memories, the regrets, the mistakes, the injustice of this world.


Stained by this life I have walked while my Savior whispered, "One day I will wipe your tears, my sweet bride..."


What a glorious hem surrounds us all. It follows us wherever we go, gathering up pieces of this life in anticipation of the next.


And one day, I will bow to the King of Kings, and I will worship Him.


And as He wipes the tears from my eyes, I will ask Him the question that cannot be answered from a closet floor....Where is she, Lord?


And in the meantime, I will start to think of my days like a wedding photograph. I will walk, veiled, down this long aisle, in breathless anticipation of the day that awaits me.


I will trust in the One Who will make all things new in His time.


I will keep my eyes on He Who waits for me.


I will.

Stephanie said...

You don't know me and I don't know you, but I have felt the pain of losing a child. My firstborn, my perfect daughter Madeline, was stillborn at 41 weeks. I have just learned of the loss of your sweet children through Carly Dudley, and I wanted you to know that I am thinking of your family. My heart is breaking for you. I know there are no words that can fix what has been shattered for you, so I won't try. Please know I am here if you ever need to talk. You can contact me at mjc157@yahoo.com or through beautyinthebreakdownart.blogspot.com.
I am wishing you moments of peace and comfort in these dark days.
with much love,
Stephanie

Liz said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you. If you ever need someone to lean on. I am here. Please know that there are so many out there that wish to support you.

Liz
www.asmallvictory.org
www.janellvictory.com